Ugly Winners, Ugly Parents

They're easy to spot.  Against league rules, they coach from the sidelines.  On the pitch they excoriate young referees until they're afraid to blow the whistle.  At Little League games they overrule the umpire's calls.  The whoosh-whoosh-whoosh of their rotors is a dissonant background noise.

  

Helicopter parents at two recent sporting events prompted a discussion about sportsmanship with my children.  When my son's soccer team lost 11-0 to a highly skilled team, they were demoralized.  I felt compelled to explain how poorly this reflected on the other team's coach and parents.  Humiliating others demonstrates a lack of integrity.

On the diamond helicopter parents called their players safe at first then proceeded to call out an opposing player because he ran out of the base path.  "Those are the rules!" an HP grandparent shouted.  If you're a stickler for rules then how about abiding by league's guidelines for spectator behavior?

When parents expect their children to win at all cost, they imbue them with a sense of entitlement and lack of empathy.  It's outrageous not to give an eight year old a break when his opponents are ahead by more than six runs.

I'm not raising crybabies.  Losing fosters the desire to win and makes kids more resilient.  When their best effort isn't good enough they focus on what to do to improve.  Failure helps them appreciate success.  Losing is hard but doesn't have to be ugly. 

Helicopter parents will continue to be an unsavory part of my children's athletic life but, going forward, when my kids see them I want them to think, "When I grow up, I'll be better than that."


I dig teachable moments.